We are faced daily with images of poverty. The entire world struggles against and lives in daily fear of it. It’s true the poor are and always will be with us (Matthew 26:11), and it is our responsibility, indeed our privilege, to minister to them (Deuteronomy15:11). However, there is an even more overwhelming and destructive poverty that we too often turn a blind eye to. It is growing at an alarming pace. When we look at pictures of the physically impoverished masses with their emaciated faces and distended stomachs we are horrified. When we see the children walking barefoot in ragged clothing through garbage heaps searching for scraps we rightfully cry out with tears of compassion and horror for our fellowman. But there is a deeper underlying poverty that nourishes the physical poverty allowing it to flourish. The poverty I speak of is our spiritual poverty. This poverty likewise has existed since the beginning, but it has grown at an even more alarming pace than material poverty. Just as a rich man can become poor almost overnight, so too the fruits of the spirit can disappear from our lives if left unguarded. We are so careful to watch over our bank accounts and we buy enormous amounts of insurance to protect our belongings, but how much thought and time do we give to safeguard our spiritual riches?
Last year I was fortunate enough to participate in the medical mission to Nicaragua. As we were preparing for the trip everyone kept telling me it was a life changing experience. While we were there I was moved time and again at the overwhelming physical poverty, and I began to realize how many physical luxuries I take for granted, such as clean drinking water, a comfortable bed, and a climate controlled home and work environment. Although I had an increased appreciation for the blessings God has given me, I was disappointed because I kept waiting for the life changing moment, the “aha” moment, the epiphany that I expected and hoped for. It never came. I came home feeling thankful and fulfilled, but not really altered. The whole time I was there I kept praying that God would reveal to me the lesson that he wanted me to learn, but when I arrived home I felt essentially unchanged, and as if I had somehow missed what God wanted me to see.
A few days passed, and I kept playing back my memories of the trip, and what I kept turning over in my mind was the fact that as poor as those people were they did not seem dissatisfied or unhappy. Perhaps that’s why I didn’t cry at the sight of their material poverty. I was moved with compassion and I wanted to help alleviate their hardships, but I did not cry for them. Instead I was filled with a curiosity about their apparent lack of awareness of their situation.
After we returned I continued to marvel at the strength and stamina of those hundreds of young women about the age of my own daughters who walked for miles on dusty, steep roads to bring their children to our mobile clinics. I looked at them with one in their arms and many times one in their womb and two or three more clinging to their worn skirts and I wondered at the mystery of what made them rise every morning to face the struggle of keeping them fed yet another day. By our standards they should have been lost in despair at the hopelessness of their lives, but they weren’t.
As I dwelled on these things after my return home my lesson was revealed. God wanted me to see poverty, but it was not their poverty. It was my own. That is when I broke down and wept. I saw myself through God’s eyes and I cried bitterly at what I saw. I saw the poverty of my spirit, and then I saw the true poverty of our nation and the world at large. We’re so proud of our material wealth. In our foolish pride we keep saying we’re the richest nation in the world. We are blind. Just as those Nicaraguans are unaware of the true depth of their material poverty, we are blind to our spiritual poverty.
Every time we feel the void we try to fill it with a new possession, or we seek some new form of entertainment to distract us from it. You have only to look at the unbelievable sums of money paid to those who provide us with those distractions to see how twisted our values have become. We’re so confused that we look to people for answers that are even more lost and confused than we are. We confuse fame and power with wisdom believing that those who have achieved wealth and fame must have the answers. When in fact most of them have such empty lives they become hopelessly lost in excesses that quickly destroy them. Why in our blindness do we seek guidance from those who are also blind and lost?
In Mathew 15:14 Jesus said, “… If a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into a pit.” In John 6:35 Jesus said, “… I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty.” In Matthew 7:20 Jesus said, “Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.” Galations 5:22 states, “The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” If we neglect the need to nurture the fruits of the spirit we will starve in our spiritual poverty and we will doom many others to the same fate through our example.
You see, I had become caught up in the “American Dream” too. I was envious of those who lived in bigger, nicer homes. I was giving, but in truth it was done more grudgingly than cheerfully. I gave of my time, but grumbled about how my life was no longer my own. I was dissatisfied in spite of the many, many blessings God had heaped on me. I had the heart of a petulant child. In short I was on the brink of spiritual starvation and didn’t realize it.
Since that time I have significantly increased the amount of time I spend in the scriptures and in prayer. I have begun to examine myself more frequently for signs of discontent or other spiritual problems. I often see areas that need to be fixed, and I know I always will. Sometimes when you ask God for a revelation you will not like what you see, but I pray that I will never become too afraid to ask.
Yes, I feel compassion for the poor, and yes I want to do more and more to help alleviate their suffering. But I have never seen anything sadder or more painful than the picture of myself among the masses sitting in fields of plenty spiritually starving to death, and unaware of our own malnourishment. We must do regular checkups and make sure we are getting a balanced spiritual diet. When we are spiritually fit we will be able to minister to others who are spiritually ill.